The day that was!!

Today was a good day with me finally spending a lot of time with mom 'n dad. Missed my class in the morning and then planned to go to the doc to check out the status of the worm in my brain ( and for those of u who think it is a joke... i am serious... i got a worm up there!!) and got to check out lotta chicks (i felt it was kind of a compensation for the pain i am goind thro' hehe) and then mom planned and unplanned visit to Havmore :d :d Man the place rocked and it was designed and constructed with a lot of artistic work put into it!! And as someone said "Men will be men"!! The first thing i did was to check the never-ending line of hottttttttttt chicks there!! After all it is Banjara Hills!! For those of u who are not able to follow the two proper nouns.. Havmore is an ice-ceam parlour and Banjara Hills is a posh locality in Hyd.

I was kinda happy that i got to spend so much time with my parents after a long time.. now-a-days my mind is full of thoughts or rather fears of how much more time i will be with them!! That fear has really taken out the worst/best of me :( The fear of my parents not accepting my relationship with my *LOVE* and the fear of that leading to being thrown out of the house!! I have no idea why I am writing all this here... but well I guess I have no other place to share my sorrows!!

Pain, pain and pain is all I have now-a-days... Or am I looking them from a wrong perspective!! Before May, 2003 I thought love was only beautiful, after that I realized it is not only beautiful but it comes along with pain, sacrifice and understanding as well and commitment demanded an excalibur of those qualities. I am ready to exhibit all of them in the finest way possible, but then the thought of right/wrong strikes my mind... Am I too young to make decisions at 21 as some people say or am I old enough to take decisions on my own?? Am I thinking in the right way which opposes the thoughts and thinking of my dad?? Is marrying a girl from some other caste still *WRONG*?? Am I doing a right thing of going on my own way??

I am being encompassed in a world of questions and doubts!! When I look at my little baby sister, I always wish I was her... without any tensions, without any pain, without any work... but then I again realize I have felt and experienced, infact experiencing the most beautiful gift god has given to the mankind, the one goal for which man has been made by God... *LOVE*!!

GOD HELP ME AND MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!